For some reason, people have a need in a conversation to advise us that we are feeling
"incorrectly". Even when the word "feel" is not in a statement we are making...people assume we are feeling a certain way and they have a need to tell us we should not "feel" that way ! Sometimes they tell us what the "correct" way to feel is. They usually say things like...You should feel etc......or...I don't know why you feel that way.... I find it all very annoying and have to try to get thru the conversation without being rude because the intent is not a bad one by those that say these things....it is just plain irritating and it invalidates our feelings.
If people were really trying to "help" us with their concerns that we are feeling "wrong"...they could say things like....tell me why do you feel that way....or ...what makes you feel or say that...... that would make a person feel validated for what they are feeling . Perhaps, like for computers and software....there needs to be a ..... Dealing with Feelings for Dummies book :-) But, the people that need a book like that probably would feel they didn't !
Yes, I am being a bit tongue in cheek and I do see the humor in this issue :-)....but, that doesn't make it less of an annoyance for me .
I do not mean to imply that everyone does that....they do not. I am fortunate and grateful to have great communicators in my world . It is the occasional one that really puts a damper on a conversation and creates a feeling of annoyance......what?.....you say I shouldn't feel annoyed? Oh No !!!!..not you too :-)
I thought I would see what other more well- known people have to say about feelings.....I hope you find them interesting...
I pay no attention whatever to anybody's praise or blame. I simply follow my own feelings.
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
I'm certainly glad Mozart did go with his own feelings and ignore those that thought otherwise.
This is one of my favorites.....sometimes there are no facts to back up your very legitimate feelings...they are legitimate because they are yours!
We apply law to facts. We don't apply feelings to facts.-Sonia Sotomayer
This one I sincerely agree with and mean !
None of this was written to hurt anybody's feelings.- Ric Flair